{"id":5175,"date":"2023-03-30T21:49:23","date_gmt":"2023-03-30T19:49:23","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.dengekurdistan.de\/?p=5175"},"modified":"2023-03-30T21:51:22","modified_gmt":"2023-03-30T19:51:22","slug":"nuh-gelsin-de-tufan-goersuen-2-remzi-bilget","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.dengekurdistan.de\/?p=5175","title":{"rendered":"NUH GELS\u0130N DE TUFAN G\u00d6RS\u00dcN! -2- Remzi B\u0130LGET"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

NUH GELS\u0130N DE TUFAN G\u00d6RS\u00dcN! -2- Remzi B\u0130LGET<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Bitmeyen G\u00fcn…<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

 Ya\u015famak g\u00fczel \u015fey be karde\u015fim, an\u0131 ya\u015famak hele… \u0130pin ucundas\u0131n, cellat att\u0131 att\u0131yor tekmeyi aya\u011f\u0131n\u0131n alt\u0131ndaki sehpaya… Atm\u0131\u015f da b\u00fcy\u00fck olas\u0131l\u0131kla, zonturlusundan hem de. K\u0131r\u0131ld\u0131 k\u0131r\u0131lacak boyun kemiklerin. Dil \u00e7\u0131km\u0131\u015f  y\u0131lan\u0131n ki gibi havada  titrek titrek oynay\u0131p, bir ya\u015fam emaresi arar. Oksijen kesilir yava\u015ftan. Bir \u015feyler olur, o an. Mucize yan\u0131 ba\u015f\u0131nda beliriverir t\u00fcm \u0131\u015f\u0131lt\u0131s\u0131yla. Al\u0131r kollar\u0131na, \u00e7ekip \u00e7\u0131kar\u0131r seni o cendereden. Oh dersin, \u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fcn k\u0131y\u0131s\u0131 da varm\u0131\u015f brader. \u00d6l\u00fcm\u00fcn k\u0131y\u0131s\u0131nda s\u00f6rf yapmak. Hemde \u00e7e\u015fitlisinden,  de\u011fik de\u011fi\u015fik.  O k\u0131y\u0131dan o k\u0131y\u0131ya ak\u0131\u015f\u0131p durmak. Ne yaman \u015fey anne! Soluksuz, nefessiz k\u0131y\u0131lar\u0131nda gezinti yapmak  \u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fcn, anne… Dur gelme, i\u015fim yok senle. Uzak ol \u00f6l\u00fcm! Sevemem seni, buz gibisin, donuk ve \u00fcrpertici. Ruhsuz, k\u0131p\u0131rt\u0131s\u0131z olunur mu hi\u00e7?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Mucize sarmal\u0131yor kollar\u0131yla benli\u011fimizi. T\u00fcm \u0131\u015f\u0131lt\u0131lar\u0131, ha\u015fmeti ve ya\u015fama dair t\u00fcm emareleriyle i\u00e7 i\u00e7eyiz. Ge\u00e7mi\u015f oturuyoruz, d\u0131\u015far\u0131s\u0131 buz so\u011fu\u011fu deminde, arabaday\u0131z i\u015fte. \u00c7arp\u0131yor kalbimiz p\u0131t p\u0131t. \u015eoktam\u0131y\u0131z, \u015fa\u015fk\u0131n m\u0131y\u0131z…  s\u0131rat k\u00f6pr\u00fcs\u00fcn\u00fcn tam ortas\u0131ndayken araba da soluklan\u0131\u015f\u0131m\u0131z\u0131n ahengi, huzura m\u0131 bo\u011fdu bizi. Donuk, k\u0131p\u0131rt\u0131s\u0131z durmaktay\u0131z. Bak\u0131\u015f\u0131yoruz duraks\u0131z. Tebess\u00fcmler sal\u0131yoruz bir birimize.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Naz\u0131m u\u011fruyor, yan\u0131ba\u015f\u0131m\u0131zda bak… K\u0131z\u0131l sa\u00e7lar\u0131n\u0131 ku\u015fanm\u0131\u015f. Y\u0131l 1987, \u0130stanbul Sa\u011fmac\u0131lar cezaevideyiz ama… B-1  ko\u011fu\u015fun da ranzamda uzanm\u0131\u015f\u0131m. Sayfalar aras\u0131ndan sesleniyor k\u0131v\u0131rc\u0131k k\u0131z\u0131l sa\u00e7l\u0131 adam. Dersini ezberlemi\u015f, okuyor ya\u015fam felsefesini. Heybetli de hem. P\u00fcr dikkat dinlemeye ge\u00e7iyoruz. Beynimize kaz\u0131yal\u0131m diye midir bilmem. Yelelerini kabartm\u0131\u015f ve y\u00fcksekce bir tepecik \u00fczerinde sanki… k\u00fckreyerek okuyor dizelerini Naz\u0131m. Transa ge\u00e7iyoruz k\u0131sa s\u00fcreli\u011fine.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

”YA\u015eAMAK \u015eAKAYA GELMEZ,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

B\u00dcY\u00dcK B\u0130R C\u0130DD\u0130YETLE Y AYACAKSIN<\/p>\n\n\n\n

B\u0130R S\u0130NCAP G\u0130B\u0130 MESELA,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

YANi, YA\u015eAMIN DI\u015eINDA VE \u00d6TES\u0130NDE H\u0130\u00c7B\u0130R \u015eEY BEKLEMEDEN<\/p>\n\n\n\n

YAN\u0130, B\u00dcT\u00dcN \u0130\u015e\u0130N G\u00dcC\u00dcN YA\u015eAMAK OLACAK.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

YA\u015eAMAYI C\u0130DD\u0130YE ALACAKSIN,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

YAN\u0130, O DERECEDE, \u00d6YLES\u0130NE K\u0130,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

MESELA, KOLLARIN BA\u011eLI ARKADAN, SIRTIN DUVARDA,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

YAHUT, KOCAMAN G\u00d6ZL\u00dcKLER\u0130N,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

BEYAZ G\u00d6MLE\u011e\u0130NLE B\u0130R LABORATUARDA<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u0130NSANLAR \u0130\u00c7\u0130N \u00d6LEB\u0130LECEKS\u0130N,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

HEM DE Y\u00dcZ\u00dcN\u00dc B\u0130LE G\u00d6RMED\u0130\u011e\u0130N \u0130NSANLAR \u0130\u00c7\u0130N,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

HEM DE H\u0130\u00c7 K\u0130MSE SEN\u0130 BUNA ZORLAMAMI\u015eKEN,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

HEM DE EN G\u00dcZEL,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

EN GER\u00c7EK \u015eEY\u0130N YASAMAK OLDU\u011eUNU B\u0130LD\u0130\u011e\u0130N HALDE.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

YAN\u0130, \u00d6YLES\u0130NE C\u0130DD\u0130YE ALACAKSIN K\u0130 YASAMAYI,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

YETM\u0130\u015e\u0130NDE B\u0130LE, MESELA, ZEYT\u0130N D\u0130KECEKS\u0130N,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

HEM DE \u00d6YLE \u00c7OCUKLARA FALAN KALIR D\u0130YE DE\u011e\u0130L,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00d6LMEKTEN KORKTU\u011eUN HALDE \u00d6L\u00dcME \u0130NANMADI\u011eIN \u0130\u00c7\u0130N,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

YASAMAK, YAN\u0130 A\u011eIR BASTI\u011eINDAN.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

D\u0130YEL\u0130M K\u0130, A\u011eIR AMEL\u0130YATLIK HASTAYIZ,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

YAN\u0130, BEYAZ MASADAN<\/p>\n\n\n\n

B\u0130R DAHA KALKMAMAK \u0130HT\u0130MAL\u0130 DE VAR<\/p>\n\n\n\n

DUYMAMAK M\u00dcMK\u00dcN DE\u011e\u0130LSE DE B\u0130RAZ ERKEN G\u0130TMEN\u0130N KEDER\u0130N\u0130<\/p>\n\n\n\n

B\u0130Z Y\u0130NE DE G\u00dcLECE\u011e\u0130Z ANLATILAN BEKTA\u015e\u0130 FIKRASINA,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

HAVA YA\u011eMURLU MU, D\u0130YE BAKACA\u011eIZ PENCEREDEN,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

YAHUT DA Y\u0130NE SABIRSIZLIKLA BEKLEYECE\u011e\u0130Z<\/p>\n\n\n\n

EN SON AJANS HABERLER\u0130N\u0130.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

D\u0130YEL\u0130M K\u0130, D\u00d6V\u00dc\u015e\u00dcLMEYE DE\u011eER B\u0130R \u015eEYLER \u0130\u00c7\u0130N,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

D\u0130YEL\u0130M K\u0130, CEPHEDEY\u0130Z.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

DAHA ORDA \u0130LK H\u00dcCUMDA, DAHA O G\u00dcN<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Y\u00dcZ\u00dcKOYUN KAPAKLANIP \u00d6LMEK DE M\u00dcMK\u00dcN.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

TUHAF B\u0130R HIN\u00c7LA B\u0130LECE\u011e\u0130Z BUNU,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

FAKAT Y\u0130NE DE \u00c7ILDIRASIYA MERAK EDECE\u011e\u0130Z<\/p>\n\n\n\n

BELK\u0130 YILLARCA S\u00dcRECEK OLAN SAVA\u015eIN SONUNU<\/p>\n\n\n\n

D\u0130YEL\u0130M K\u0130, HAP\u0130STEY\u0130Z,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

YA\u015eIMIZ DA ELL\u0130YE YAKIN,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

DAHA DA ON SEK\u0130Z SENE OLSUN A\u00c7ILMASINA DEM\u0130R KAPININ.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Y\u0130NE DE DI\u015eARIYLA BERABER YA\u015eAYACA\u011eIZ,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u0130NSANLARI, HAYVANLARI, KAVGASI VE R\u00dcZGARIYLA<\/p>\n\n\n\n

YAN\u0130, DUVARIN ARKASINDAK\u0130 DI\u015eARIYLA.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

YAN\u0130, NASIL VE NERDE OLURSAK OLALIM<\/p>\n\n\n\n

H\u0130\u00c7 \u00d6L\u00dcNMEYECEKM\u0130\u015e G\u0130B\u0130 YA\u015eANACAK…<\/p>\n\n\n\n

BU D\u00dcNYA SO\u011eUYACAK,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

YILDIZLARIN ARASINDA B\u0130R YILDIZ,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

HEM DE EN UFACIKLARINDAN,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

MAV\u0130 KAD\u0130FEDEN B\u0130R YILDIZ ZERRES\u0130 YAN\u0130,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

YAN\u0130, BU KOSKOCAMAN D\u00dcNYAMIZ.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

BU D\u00dcNYA SO\u011eUYACAK G\u00dcN\u00dcN B\u0130R\u0130NDE,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

HATTA B\u0130R BUZ YI\u011eINI<\/p>\n\n\n\n

YAHUT \u00d6L\u00dc B\u0130R BULUT G\u0130B\u0130 DE DE\u011e\u0130L,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

BO\u015e B\u0130R CEV\u0130Z G\u0130B\u0130 YUVARLANACAK<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Z\u0130F\u0130R\u0130 KARANLIKTA U\u00c7SUZ BUCAKSIZ.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u015e\u0130MD\u0130DEN \u00c7EK\u0130LECEK ACISI BUNUN,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

DUYULACAK MAHZUNLU\u011eU \u015e\u0130MD\u0130DEN.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

B\u00d6YLES\u0130NE SEV\u0130LECEK BU D\u00dcNYA<\/p>\n\n\n\n

“YA\u015eADIM” D\u0130YEB\u0130LMEN \u0130\u00c7\u0130N…”<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Soluklanmadan dinliyoruz. Baba nasihati tad\u0131nda m\u00fcbarek, say say bitmiyor. \u0130\u00e7iyoruz s\u00f6ylenenleri, kafa sall\u0131yoruz, do\u011fru s\u00f6ylersin dercesine.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Belli, usta deprem tufan\u0131n\u0131 ya\u015famam\u0131\u015f ama. Tek sat\u0131r karalamam\u0131\u015f, k\u00f6r karanl\u0131kta g\u00fcmb\u00fcr g\u00fcmb\u00fcr \u00e7arp\u0131lmalar\u0131n girdab\u0131nda nas\u0131l tutunulur ya\u015fama… Bas bas ba\u011f\u0131r\u0131p k\u00fcfretmek isterken alt\u0131m\u0131zda ki o boynozlu yarat\u0131\u011fa…    Boynozunun ucuna takm\u0131\u015fta, savurup duran o k\u00f6ftehor’a. \u0130ki s\u00f6zc\u00fck edememenin \u0131st\u0131rab\u0131n\u0131 s\u00f6ylemedin be usta. Gri ve beton so\u011fuklu\u011funun \u00e7ukurunda k\u0131vran\u0131rken ya\u015famaya dair tek c\u00fcmle kurmam\u0131\u015fs\u0131n be koca Naz\u0131m, diyoruz. Ele\u015ftiri bab\u0131nda de\u011fil elbet. Nuh bile \u015fa\u015fk\u0131na d\u00f6n\u00fcp, acze d\u00fc\u015ft\u00fc yan\u0131ba\u015f\u0131m\u0131zd,g\u00f6rd\u00fck. Naz\u0131m usta nerden bilsin deprem tufan\u0131n\u0131, ya\u015famam\u0131\u015f o da, belli… Ondard\u0131r her halde. Etmemi\u015f bir \u00e7ift s\u00f6z, olsun severiz yine de Naz\u0131m’\u0131.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Araba \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131yor, \u0131s\u0131 gelmiyor hala.  Belli, araba da kalaca\u011f\u0131z.  Arka koltuklar\u0131 yat\u0131r\u0131yoruz, bir battaniye alta seriliyor. Bir battaniye daha var. Vallahi t\u00fcm\u00fcm\u00fcz\u00fcn montlar\u0131 da mevcutlu. Nas\u0131l da bulup alm\u0131\u015f\u0131z b\u00fct\u00fcn bunlar\u0131 o k\u00f6r karanl\u0131kta? Ve de \u00e7\u0131rp\u0131n\u0131rken   d\u00f6rt duvar i\u00e7inde, ne ara kapm\u0131\u015f\u0131z.  Bir tek ayakkab\u0131lar\u0131m\u0131z eksik sanki, terliklerle \u00e7\u0131km\u0131\u015f\u0131z. Eh, tecr\u00fcbe konu\u015fuyor, \u0130stanbul depremlerini g\u00f6rd\u00fck biz. Bilimsel y\u00f6ntemlerin hi\u00e7 birini hat\u0131rlamasak da o hangamede. Ne yatak yan\u0131na uzand\u0131k ne de masa alt\u0131na. Kim dinler Deprem Dede’yi. Deprem \u00e7antas\u0131 da neymi\u015f, korunma kurallar\u0131n\u0131 kim takar? Olsun, biz battaniye ve montlar\u0131m\u0131z\u0131 alm\u0131\u015f\u0131z ya, gerisi teferruat. Oturma d\u00fczenini de olu\u015fturduk tezelden, gelen aramalar i\u00e7inde. O saat’te epeyce uyan\u0131k olan varm\u0131\u015f, geceye akanlar belki, \u015fa\u015fk\u0131n\u0131m. \u00c7al\u0131yor telefon pe\u015f pe\u015fe, nadiren duyuyoruz bir kelime. ‘Alo’ dan  sonras\u0131 yok. \u0130lk k\u0131z\u0131m ar\u0131yor, Otob\u00fcsle \u0130stanbuldan geliyor, \u015f\u00f6ylemi\u015ftim az evvel. Aramaya devam ediyor duraks\u0131z. 17  kez aram\u0131\u015f, soradan bakt\u0131m.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

‘Ablay\u0131 arayal\u0131m’ diyor e\u015fim, d\u00fczen karma\u015fas\u0131 bitende. Telefonu a\u00e7\u0131yorum, 4.32′ yi g\u00f6steriyor saat. Sonradan \u00f6greniyoruz, 4.20 de ba\u015flam\u0131\u015f deprem. \u0130ki dakikas\u0131n\u0131 deprem an\u0131na say\u0131n, f\u0131rt\u0131na estirip kurulmu\u015fuz arabaya 10 dakika i\u00e7in de. Yi\u011fitlikten mi panikten mi, bilemem. \u00c7al\u0131yor telefon, ses yok abladan. Bir daha bir daha, yok… A\u00e7an yok telefonu. Abuzer’i diyor, Ebru’yu ara. Telfonlar\u0131 \u00e7alm\u0131yor bile. Hepsi ayn\u0131 bina da oturuyorlar. Huzura ermi\u015ftik oysa az \u00f6ncesinde. Topu topu  bir on dakika, ne kadar da mutlanm\u0131\u015ft\u0131k. Zafer serho\u015flu\u011fu tad\u0131nda…  Muzaffer bir ordu neferleri gibiydik.  Kazanm\u0131\u015ft\u0131k meydan muharebesini. Tad\u0131n\u0131 \u00e7\u0131kartmak hakk\u0131m\u0131zd\u0131. Kutlamalar yapacakt\u0131k, yar\u0131nlarda. Kursa\u011f\u0131m\u0131zda kald\u0131 b\u00fct\u00fcn sevin\u00e7lerimiz.  H\u00fcz\u00fcn dolduk bendek bendek. Kat kat korkulara g\u00f6m\u00fcld\u00fck. Ac\u0131larla doldu benli\u011fimiz, kahrolduk. ‘Ara bi daha’ diye sesleniyor e\u015fim. \u00c7alan telefon yok. Hatlar iptaldir diyorum, buras\u0131  T\u00fcrkiye. Hangi afette \u00e7al\u0131\u015ft\u0131 ki ileti\u015fim a\u011flar\u0131? Tela\u015f f\u0131rt\u0131nalar\u0131 koparken i\u00e7imizde, teselli ar\u0131yoruz, sistemin \u00e7\u00fcr\u00fcm\u00fc\u015fl\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn den, belkilere s\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131yoruz. Hani hatlar d\u00fc\u015fm\u00fcyor da ondan a\u00e7mazlar, diye. Hadi gidelim diyoruz…  Nerden, hangi yoldan gitsek?  Karap\u0131nar yolundan direk Valilik \u00f6n\u00fcne var\u0131r\u0131z, arkas\u0131 ablan\u0131n evi… \u0130tiraz ediyorum bu fikre, besbelli fatura a\u011f\u0131r. O yol kapal\u0131d\u0131r, \u00e7\u0131km\u0131\u015ft\u0131r ara\u00e7lar yola, ge\u00e7 olur, diyorum.  \u00d6\u011freniyoruz soradan, ara\u00e7lardan de\u011fil, enkazlarla kapanm\u0131\u015f oralar zaten. Flamingo yolundan ana yola \u00e7\u0131kmak mant\u0131kl\u0131 geliyor. Hareket ediyoruz, kalp at\u0131\u015flar\u0131m\u0131z h\u0131zl\u0131. Ercan, Y\u0131ld\u0131z diyoruz. Ayr\u0131 binalardalar, Ablan\u0131n \u00e7ocuklar\u0131… Biz mi ula\u015ft\u0131k Ercan m\u0131, iniyorken E\u011fri \u00c7ay’a do\u011fru, hat\u0131rlam\u0131yorum. ‘Biz iyiyiz de’ diyor Ercan…  S\u00f6yle be adam, ‘de’ si ne? B\u0131rakma insan\u0131 tererd\u00fct kuyular\u0131na. Sesi de b\u00fckl\u00fcm b\u00fckl\u00fcm geliyor, dizilircesine g\u0131rtla\u011f\u0131na. ‘Anam\u0131n binas\u0131 yok’ diyor sonunda. \u0130ki c\u00fcmle ile bitiriyoruz, uzun konu\u015fmam\u0131z\u0131. Anl\u0131yoruz vahameti. Kapan\u0131yor yine telefon. Yeniden ‘araa’ nidas\u0131n\u0131 duyuyorum, arkadan. Gerek yok, iki dakika da oraday\u0131z, hatlar \u00e7al\u0131\u015fm\u0131yor zaten. Hop inip kalk\u0131yor y\u00fcre\u011fimiz. Y\u00fckleniyorum gaz pedal\u0131na. Ara\u00e7lar h\u0131zla dolu\u015fmu\u015f yollara. Ka\u00e7\u0131yorlar m\u0131 yoksa sevdiklerine yeti\u015fme pe\u015findeler mi, bilinmez. Bizim gibiler diye ge\u00e7iriyorum i\u00e7imden, herkesler sevdiklerine ula\u015fma umuduyla \u00e7\u0131km\u0131\u015flar yola… E\u011fri \u00c7ay’dan dikiliyoruz Valili\u011fe do\u011fru. Solumuzda ki kar\u015f\u0131t yol, moloz y\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131yla dolu, kapal\u0131. Sayam\u0131yoruz ka\u00e7 bina yerle bir. \u00c7abuk olmal\u0131, yeti\u015fmeliyiz, nicedir halleri canlar\u0131m\u0131z\u0131n? \u0130lerisi ara\u00e7 \u00e7\u00fcmb\u00fc\u015f\u00fc. Sa\u011fa k\u0131r\u0131p  Bozbey yoluna girece\u011fiz. Mesafemiz iki dakikal\u0131k. Bozbey giri\u015finde yola y\u0131\u011f\u0131lm\u0131\u015f bir bina. \u00c7aresiz bak\u0131n\u0131yoruz etraf\u0131m\u0131za… Tanr\u0131m nedir bu? Nutkumuz tutuluyor, dona kal\u0131yoruz. Sola d\u00f6nece\u011fiz enkaz, ilerisi enkaz, gidilmez diyorum.  Sa\u011f\u0131m\u0131zda  otopark\u0131ms\u0131 bir yere \u00e7ekip duruyorum. Karanl\u0131k deryas\u0131nda etraf\u0131 s\u00fcz\u00fcyoruz. Kavramaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131yoruz tufan\u0131n boyutunu. Bo\u015f yere de\u011filmi\u015f deprem an\u0131ndaki inim inim inlemeler.  Hi\u00e7ten \u00e7\u0131\u011fl\u0131k atmam\u0131\u015f koca binalar. Ka\u00e7\u0131nc\u0131 bina sayamad\u0131k, yerle bir.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Siz kal\u0131n, ben bi varay\u0131m diyorum. Y\u00fcr\u00fcr ad\u0131m be\u015f dakika mesafe. ‘Ben’ diyor e\u015fim, olmaz diyorum, Zeli\u015fimiz araba da. Yaln\u0131z b\u0131rakamay\u0131z. Bozbey yolunu yaya da ge\u00e7emiyorum, ge\u00e7it vermiyor moloz y\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131. Labirentler \u00e7izerek ilerliyorum. Bir a\u015fa\u011f\u0131 soka\u011fa bir yukar\u0131kine girip \u00e7\u0131kmaktay\u0131m.  Hangi bina y\u0131k\u0131lacak durumda alg\u0131l\u0131yam\u0131yorum, yamulmu\u015f \u00e7o\u011fu. Pizza kulelerini dizmi\u015fler Ad\u0131yaman’a tekmilinden, elini dayasan inecek gibiler. \u00dczerime d\u00fc\u015fer mi biri diye radarlar\u0131m a\u00e7\u0131k. Telefon \u0131\u015f\u0131\u011f\u0131nda ilerlemeye \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131yorum, kar tad\u0131nda ya\u011fmur bir h\u0131\u015f\u0131m inmekte. Boynumdan sular iniyor g\u00f6vdemin derinliklerine. Dizime kadar batm\u0131\u015f\u0131m suya. Yol kalmam\u0131\u015f, on ad\u0131m y\u00fcr\u00fcyesin. Oy havar diyorum her ad\u0131m\u0131m da, oy havar.   \u00c7\u0131\u011fl\u0131klar \u00e7o\u011fal\u0131yor durmadan. Yar\u0131\u015f\u0131rcas\u0131na ko\u015fturuyor insanlar. Nere varacaklar\u0131n\u0131 bilmez gibiler. Y\u00f6nleri d\u00f6rt bir yana, h\u0131zla ve feryatlarla ko\u015fturuyorlar… Ben de kervana kat\u0131lm\u0131\u015f\u0131m, olabildi\u011fince h\u0131zl\u0131.  Akeda\u015f’\u0131 ge\u00e7ip  ula\u015fabiliyorum Bozbey Sitesi \u00f6n\u00fcne. Kar\u015f\u0131mda Ablan\u0131n, Zeyno ablan\u0131n evi. \u0130\u00e7im ge\u00e7iyor, kan\u0131m bo\u015fal\u0131yor sanki. Sa\u011f\u0131m sa\u011f\u0131m sa\u011f\u0131l\u0131yorum apans\u0131z. Hafiften \u015fafa\u011f\u0131n \u0131\u015f\u0131lt\u0131s\u0131 var sanki bulut lar\u0131n\u0131n ard\u0131nda. Se\u00e7ilebiliyor gibi g\u00f6r\u00fcnt\u00fc alan\u0131m.  Alt\u0131 kat bina inmi\u015f iki kat boyuna. Hem de \u00fcsten preslenmi\u015fcesine. Kocaman bir k\u00f6m\u00fcrl\u00fc \u00fct\u00fc ile d\u00fczlenmi\u015f gibi.  \u015ea\u015fk\u0131n d\u00f6n\u00fcyor\u013aar bizimkiler, i\u015fte oradalar. Figanlar ar\u015f\u0131 sarm\u0131\u015f Bozbey de. D\u00f6rt yan\u0131m \u00e7\u0131\u011fl\u0131k, her yan\u0131m feryat. \u0130simler \u00e7a\u011fr\u0131l\u0131yor her a\u011f\u0131zdan, de\u011fi\u015fik ve farkl\u0131 isimler. Kim kime seslenmekte belli de\u011fil. U\u011fultu deryas\u0131 olmu\u015f buralar, g\u00f6kkubbe indiriyor duraks\u0131z ya\u011fmurunu. Kucakla\u015f\u0131p bak\u0131\u015f\u0131yoruz abladan geride kalanlarla. Umutsuz, umars\u0131z hallerimiz. B\u00f6\u011fr\u00fcm\u00fczde ellerimiz, s\u00fcz\u00fcyoruz, d\u00fcmd\u00fcz olan binay\u0131. Beton y\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131n\u0131 delip,  canlar\u0131 g\u00f6rme pe\u015finde g\u00f6zldrimiz, r\u00f6ntgen cihaz\u0131 misali…<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Molozlar\u0131n \u00fczerinde d\u00f6n\u00fcp duruyoruz. Atabilece\u011fimiz moloz par\u00e7alar\u0131n\u0131 tutup f\u0131rlat\u0131yoz yola do\u011fru, canh\u0131ra\u015f. Ba\u011f\u0131r\u0131yoruz en \u00fcst perdeden, avaz\u0131m\u0131z\u0131n yetti\u011fince. Ab\u00fczer, Ebru, Ada, diye hayk\u0131r\u0131yor birimiz. Ela, Anne, Alicem diye \u00e7\u0131\u011f\u0131rmakta di\u011ferimiz. ‘Sesimizi duyuyormusunuz’ diye feryat ediyor \u00f6b\u00fcr\u00fcm\u00fcz. Kulaklar\u0131m\u0131z\u0131 dayay\u0131p beton bloklar\u0131na, bir nefes duymaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131yoruz. Hava bu kadar  so\u011fuk, ya\u011fmur   bu kadar \u0131slak m\u0131 olur?  B\u00f6ylesi bir g\u00fcn de sen mi eksiktin, az geri dursan olmazm\u0131yd\u0131 m\u00fcbarek! Beton so\u011fu\u011fu az m\u0131 geldi, donuyor \u015fimdi canlar. Tir tir  titremekte tenleri…s\u0131z\u0131m s\u0131z\u0131m s\u0131zlamakta kemikleri. Reva m\u0131 \u015fimdi, hangi insafa s\u0131\u011far? Zang\u0131r zang\u0131r oldu y\u00fcre\u011fim, b\u00fcz\u00fclmekteyim. Enkaz\u0131 dolan\u0131p duruyoruz, manas\u0131z ve bi \u00e7are. Bir ses, bir nefes… ya\u011fmurun beton par\u00e7alar\u0131nda yank\u0131lanan \u015fak\u0131rt\u0131lar\u0131ndan  ba\u015fka ses i\u015fitilmiyor. Duram\u0131yoruz, kald\u0131rabilece\u011fimiz ne bulsak f\u0131rlat\u0131yoruz a\u015fa\u011f\u0131ya, takats\u0131z kalana kadar.  \u0130\u011fne ile kuyu kazmadan \u00f6te de\u011fil yapt\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z. Sudan \u00e7\u0131km\u0131\u015f s\u0131\u00e7ana d\u00f6nm\u00fc\u015f\u00fcz hepimiz. Ara da kar\u015f\u0131 bina \u00f6n\u00fcnde yanan ate\u015fin ba\u015f\u0131na iniyoruz. Ne bir k\u00fcrek var elimizde ne de bir kazma… \u00e7\u0131plak ellerle ne yap\u0131labilinir ki? Bo\u015fa \u00e7ekiyoruz k\u00fcre\u011fi, umut d\u00fcnyas\u0131 i\u015fte.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Bir g\u00fcn \u00f6ncesiydi daha. Bir k\u00f6yden ge\u00e7mi\u015f olsundan gelmekteydik, keyifliydik d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015fte. Her d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015fte bir yerlerden, adet olmu\u015ftu art\u0131k, soruyoruz yine: ‘Zeyno can’ diyoruz, ‘bir evin bark\u0131n var m\u0131, gidiyormuyuz bize…’  Her zaman ki cevab\u0131m\u0131z\u0131 alm\u0131\u015ft\u0131k yine. ‘Benim bir evim bark\u0131m var’. Israr olmazd\u0131 bu s\u00f6zden sonra. B\u0131rakt\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131zda. Evinin kap\u0131s\u0131na, alm\u0131\u015ft\u0131 tam bu\u011fday ekme\u011fimizi, uzat\u0131vermi\u015fti camdan. G\u00fcl\u00fc\u015fm\u00fc\u015ft\u00fck, herzaman ki bu hallerimize. \u00c7ok tuhaf de\u011fil mi be abla, \u015fimdi \u015fu haller? Reva m\u0131 allah\u0131n seven, sen betonlar alt\u0131nda, biz olmu\u015fuz seyirci. Yak\u0131\u015ft\u0131 m\u0131 bu \u00e7aresiz ve aciz b\u0131rakmalar? K\u0131ymazd\u0131n bizlere, k\u0131ramazd\u0131n. Ablayd\u0131n, ana yar\u0131s\u0131 olmu\u015ftun, kanatlar a\u00e7ard\u0131n bize. K\u0131zd\u0131rmazd\u0131n kimseyi, yar\u0131n Helin gelen de sizdeyim demi\u015ftin, ka\u00e7 saat ge\u00e7ti.  Acelen neydi ki bu kadar? Bak Helin gelmek \u00fczere, tak\u0131ver ayakab\u0131lar\u0131n\u0131. Yaln\u0131z, tek ba\u015f\u0131nam\u0131s\u0131n karanl\u0131k denizinde…  varabildin mi bir \u00fcst kata. Ab\u00fczer ile Ebru cana ula\u015fabildi mi ellerin? Torunlar\u0131n\u0131 sarmalayabildin mi, kuzular\u0131m diye? K\u0131r\u0131ld\u0131 kanatlar\u0131n da ula\u015famad\u0131n m\u0131 yoksa? Tela\u015f\u0131n dindi mi acep?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Meraktan harap oldu \u015fimdi araba da beklerken hayat yolda\u015f\u0131m, bir varay\u0131m yan\u0131na. Var\u0131p ne desem, beynim durmakta. Bir ak\u0131l ver, ablas\u0131n sen. Usul usul revan oluyorum park yerine, g\u00f6zlerim yerde. Ayaklar\u0131m isyanda, direniyor y\u00fcr\u00fcme iste\u011fime. Sorular\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcyorum… ‘\u00e7\u0131km\u0131\u015flar m\u0131 enkazdan, yaral\u0131lar m\u0131, olumlu bir\u015feyler s\u00f6yle?..’  S\u00fcrte s\u00fcrte moloz par\u00e7alar\u0131na ad\u0131mlar\u0131m\u0131, ilerlemektey<\/p>\n\n\n\n

im. G\u00f6\u011f\u00fcn renginde d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcncelerim, koyu ve renksiz. Ate\u015fler \u00e7o\u011falm\u0131\u015f y\u0131k\u0131nt\u0131lar ba\u015f\u0131nda, f\u0131ganlar \u00e7\u0131\u011f gibi. Kayn\u0131yor i\u00e7im, bo\u011fulur gibiyim, bo\u011fum bo\u011fum gelen i\u00e7imdeki  kabart\u0131, d\u00fc\u011f\u00fcm d\u00fc\u011f\u00fcm diziliyor g\u0131rtla\u011f\u0131ma. Nefesim kesilmekte, tutmaya zorluyorum kendimi, damlalar iniyor s\u0131ra s\u0131ra yanaklar\u0131mdan. Ayaklar\u0131m geri tepiyor sanki. Ne diyece\u011fimi kurgulamaktay\u0131m, yol bulam\u0131yorum. Bi\u00e7areyim.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Araban\u0131n kap\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 a\u00e7\u0131p y\u0131\u011f\u0131l\u0131yorum, belli etmemeye \u00e7al\u0131\u015farak hallerimi. Ne s\u00f6ylesem, ne desem ki, diyorum pe\u015finen. G\u00f6zlerle anlat\u0131p anla\u015f\u0131yoruz, \u00e7ok \u015fey sormuyor e\u015fim. G\u00f6zleri dolu dolu, s\u00f6zc\u00fck \u00e7\u0131km\u0131yor a\u011fz\u0131ndan. ‘Ben bi varay\u0131m, sen bekle’ diyor. \u00c7\u0131k\u0131yoruz birlikte, dur diyorum, terlikle olmaz. Bah\u00e7e kost\u00fcmlerim araba da. Kara lasti\u011fi o’na veriyorum, su ge\u00e7irmez. Sar\u0131 \u00e7izmelerimi de ben ge\u00e7iriyorum \u00e7\u0131plak ayaklar\u0131ma. Dikkat et, binalar \u00e7ok tehlikeli, duman olmu\u015flar yol boyu diyorum. Ayd\u0131nlan\u0131yor ortal\u0131k. Gelmeliydi \u015fimdiye k\u0131z\u0131m. Ar\u0131yorum  durmadan. Telefon’dan, whatsap’dan, olmuyor. Mesaj at\u0131yorum, geliyor cevap. G\u00f6lba\u015f\u0131’ndaym\u0131\u015f. Yol deprem de yar\u0131lm\u0131\u015f, durmu\u015f trafik. Sormadan ben, buras\u0131 \u00e7ok k\u00f6t\u00fc baba, diyor k\u0131z\u0131m. \u0130liklerim titriyor, klimay\u0131 sona getiriyorum. Motor \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131yor durmaks\u0131z\u0131n. Kapat\u0131yorum g\u00f6zlerimi, kafam olmu\u015f ambele  zonkluyor. Buzlar\u0131m \u00e7\u00f6z\u00fclmekte, \u0131l\u0131maktay\u0131m. Masay\u0131 kurmu\u015f okey \u00e7eviriyoruz. Ab\u00fczer teyzesiyle, Ebru benle e\u015fle\u015fmi\u015fiz. Birinci partiyi kaybediyoruz, ‘bu size avans’ diyor Ebru. \u0130kincisinde de at\u0131yoruz havluyu, daha \u00f6nceleri peri\u015fan ediyorduk oysa. K\u00fcnefe \u00fcst\u00fc dondurmas\u0131na oynuyoruz. \u015eans\u0131m\u0131z k\u0131r\u0131k, kelle pa\u00e7as\u0131na bir sonki sefere diye \u015famataday\u0131z, hepsi iki g\u00fcn  \u00f6ncesiydi. Yeri g\u00f6\u011f\u00fc y\u0131kan hiperaktif Alicem, nas\u0131lda usluyd\u0131 o g\u00fcn. Ab\u00fczer ne zaman oluyoruz bah\u00e7e kom\u015fusu? Ka\u00e7 senedir tasarlamaktay\u0131z oysa. ‘Sizinle her \u015feye var\u0131z abi’ diyor, Ebru. Hesaps\u0131z ve i\u00e7ten s\u00f6zleri. G\u00f6zlerimi a\u00e7\u0131yorum, i\u00e7im ge\u00e7mi\u015f a\u00e7l\u0131ktand\u0131r, diyorum. Sersem gibiyim, harbisinden. Ya\u011fmur yava\u015fdan serpi\u015ftiriyor. Zelal\u0131m k\u0131rpmam\u0131\u015f daha g\u00f6zlerini. Belli epeyce huzursuz, sevmez ani de\u011fi\u015fkenlikleri. Ablan gelecek birazdan diyorum, birlikte gidip alaca\u011f\u0131z duraktan. G\u00fcl\u00fcms\u00fcyor dudak ucuyla. Nerde kald\u0131 bu otob\u00fcs, iki saatte gelmez mi k\u0131rk dakikal\u0131k yolu. Pazarc\u0131k – Ad\u0131yaman en fazla iki saat, saat olmu\u015f onbir. \u0130nip yollan\u0131yorum k\u0131z\u0131m\u0131n inece\u011fi dura\u011fa do\u011fru. Topuklar\u0131m\u0131 s\u00fcrte s\u00fcrte gidiyorum, ta\u015f\u0131m\u0131yor bacaklar\u0131m beni.  Park Hosp\u0131t\u0131l Hastahanesi kar\u015f\u0131s\u0131nda k\u0131z\u0131m, iki eli iki valiz de durakta. Duygu seli olup akmakta g\u00f6zya\u015flar\u0131m, belli etmemeye \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131yorum. \u00dcrpertiler i\u00e7inde kalbim, inip kalkmakta. Sakin olma \u00e7a\u011fr\u0131lar\u0131ma kulak vermiyor. Bir insan iki duy\u011fuyu bir arada nas\u0131l ya\u015farm\u0131\u015f \u00e7ok ilgin\u00e7. H\u00fczn\u00fcmden \u00e7\u00f6km\u00fc\u015f omuzlar\u0131m, lakin sevin\u00e7ten de k\u0131p\u0131r k\u0131p\u0131r y\u00fcre\u011fim. K\u0131z\u0131m kar\u015f\u0131mda i\u015fte, ya\u015famaktay\u0131zve a\u00e7m\u0131\u015f\u0131z kollar\u0131m\u0131z\u0131. H\u00fczn\u00fcn g\u00f6be\u011finde hazz\u0131n\u0131 tatmaktay\u0131z sevincin. S\u0131ms\u0131k\u0131 sar\u0131l\u0131yoruz, ad\u0131mlar\u0131m  yeti\u015fti\u011finde. B\u00f6ylesi sar\u0131lmay\u0131 do\u011fdu\u011fu g\u00fcn yapm\u0131\u015ft\u0131k k\u0131z\u0131mla, 23 y\u0131l kadar olmu\u015f. Ah, ne kadar da severmi\u015fim ben bu veledi, arada \u00f6fkelendirir beni oysa. Kokluyorum doyas\u0131ya, \u00e7akal diyorum korktun mu? Ne habersin, armut diyorum. Dolu dolu olmu\u015f g\u00f6zlerimiz. Bak\u0131\u015f\u0131yoruz kar\u0131\u015f\u0131k duy\u011fu yo\u011funlu\u011fuyla, g\u00f6zlerimiz muhabbet de. S\u00f6zc\u00fckler kenera \u00e7ekiliyor. Hadi diyorum, Zelal arabada yaln\u0131z, s\u0131kk\u0131nd\u0131r can\u0131.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Var\u0131yoruz  arabaya, anne de geliyor az sonra. Kenetleniyoruz hepten, sevin\u00e7 mi h\u00fcz\u00fcn m\u00fc \u00f6rg\u00fcs\u00fc bilmem. G\u00f6zya\u015flar\u0131m\u0131z kar\u0131\u015fmakta inerken. Oh diyoruz, hayattay\u0131z, ya\u015famaktay\u0131z i\u015fte. Vah diyoruz, umut yok  canlardan. Ge\u00e7iyor bir on dakika, enkaza y\u00f6neliyoruz. Foto\u011fraf daha net g\u00f6r\u00fcnmekte \u015fimdi, g\u00fcn tam\u0131yla a\u011farm\u0131\u015f. Bu nas\u0131l bir depremmi\u015f tanr\u0131m, hurdal\u0131\u011fa d\u00f6nm\u00fc\u015f  Alita\u015f\u0131 mahallesi. Yar\u0131s\u0131 yerle bir olmu\u015f, ayaktakiler tam kepaze durumda. Sallasan gitti gidecek. Zor buluyoruz, y\u0131k\u0131nt\u0131dan uzak park edecek bir yeri. (s\u00fcrecek)<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Kaynak: Remzi Bilget’in Facebook sayfas\u0131ndan al\u0131nm\u0131\u015ft\u0131r. <\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

NUH GELS\u0130N DE TUFAN G\u00d6RS\u00dcN! -2- Remzi B\u0130LGET Bitmeyen G\u00fcn…  Ya\u015famak g\u00fczel \u015fey be karde\u015fim, an\u0131 ya\u015famak hele… \u0130pin ucundas\u0131n, cellat att\u0131 att\u0131yor tekmeyi aya\u011f\u0131n\u0131n alt\u0131ndaki sehpaya… Atm\u0131\u015f da b\u00fcy\u00fck olas\u0131l\u0131kla, zonturlusundan hem de. K\u0131r\u0131ld\u0131 k\u0131r\u0131lacak boyun kemiklerin. Dil \u00e7\u0131km\u0131\u015f  y\u0131lan\u0131n ki gibi havada  titrek titrek oynay\u0131p, bir ya\u015fam emaresi arar. Oksijen kesilir yava\u015ftan. Bir …<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":5168,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[114,43,113,59,54,58,41,42,111,55,112],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.dengekurdistan.de\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5175"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.dengekurdistan.de\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.dengekurdistan.de\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.dengekurdistan.de\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.dengekurdistan.de\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=5175"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"http:\/\/www.dengekurdistan.de\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5175\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5177,"href":"http:\/\/www.dengekurdistan.de\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5175\/revisions\/5177"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.dengekurdistan.de\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/5168"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.dengekurdistan.de\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=5175"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.dengekurdistan.de\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=5175"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.dengekurdistan.de\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=5175"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}